Posted in Lifestyle

Stress

Whether you’re currently stressed, or you’re relaxed and ready to take on the week, stress is something that comes for us all at some point and likes to play havoc with our lives – mentally and physically.

 

Right now, while writing this, I feel a tiny bit stressed. I know I have 6 posts to write up today and this is the first of those, so I want to do the best I can with each of them. It’s not like I can just write them, schedule them, and forget about them again! But overall, I’m not too stressed at the minute. If I stop and think about hosting the GRLPOWR chat on Thursday, then yes I will be quite stressed but we’re trying not to think about that right now. My questions are written up and all I can do now is hope you all come join in.

 

Normally, I get stressed over very trivial things. They may seem trivial to you, or even to me now while I’m reasonably relaxed, but in those moments I get so wound up about the tiniest things. For example, and one my friends won’t let me forget for a long time, we barbecued for 24 people and it reached a stage I just wanted food. Dad sent through the freshly cooked sausages and a few minutes later no one had moved but it was one of those situations where family were waiting to let friends go first and friends were waiting to let family go first, and I just didn’t want to be the first to go. So I waited a few minutes and then went through and told everyone that sausages were ready and they should go get them. Except I may have been rather forceful in how I said it… whoops… Ah well, it meant I could eat!

 

I get stressed if I’m running late for something, if I’m travelling, if I’m organising things, and if people don’t do what they were meant to do when they were meant to do it. Normal things like exams stress me out. I got so worked up when I had to go to my first LGBTQ+ event on my own last year that I ended up crying in Nuala’s room before going. Loud noises, big crowds, tight enclosed spaces… Wow I get stressed over quite a lot!

 

I try not to let these things affect my day-to-day life but sometimes it does get the better of me, and I end up a quivering mess feeling paranoid and struggling to breathe normally. Either that, or I just get angry and/or cry. If you remember back in August during my resits? I was so stressed I cried for 3 hours without stopping – not great! Normally during exams I get stressed because I feel I know nothing so spend all day inside revising and doing nothing else, and then when it comes to bedtime I can’t sleep because I feel guilty for not being up and revising. So I get up and continue revision, and start the next day exhausted. And so the new day brings about revision with very little going in due to the lack of sleep and so the endless cycle begins.

 

However, I know I have at least 3 people who can calm me down when I reach that level of stress. Nuala is great at supporting you and being there for you when you need her, even if the rest of the time she doesn’t give off that impression. The number of times I’ve been stressed and ended up going straight to Nuala to help me calm down and gain some perspective. Jason is also pretty good at calming me down, simply because of the number of times he’s had to in the past! The third actually isn’t in the flat (and this is nothing against Mary – she’s great but I haven’t gone to her when I’m properly stressed yet. But yes, Pablo  (again, he asked for this name on the blog so you won’t know him) has a calming quality that I am drawn to when stressed. I don’t know what it is but he would actually be my first point of call if he wasn’t so flipping busy all the time.

 

So, as you may have noticed, those three are all based in Scotland and it very much depends on if they’re around for me to talk to, so what do I do to destress without them? Well, any form of exercise is good. Even if it’s just a walk, getting into a completely different state of mind is good. Either a hot shower or bath also helps, especially if I can play my music as loud as I want and sing along. Of course, I frequently turn to blogging when I’m stressed – I suppose that makes you a part of my ‘who calms me’ part! Reading, knitting, colouring, anything creative just distracts me and I eventually feel better. Surprisingly, watching TV and films doesn’t actually help me unwind – I do them, but they don’t give me that feeling of clarity that the others do. Funny, considering how much time they take out of my day.

 

How about you? What stresses you out and how do you deal with it? Let me know!

 

Ktkinnes xx

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Posted in Sunday's Summary

Sunday again

Well once again it’s that time of the week when I tell you all the oh so exciting things I got up to in the past 7 days. Did you know, Sundays are the most popular day for people to view my blog? That’s quite interesting actually. Sunday’s the day I tend to not be online as much! Well Saturdays are when I tend to take a break from social media anyway so in my mind Sunday wouldn’t be a popular day. But you know what you like to do, who am I to question it? 
My most popular post this week was Well then, and before I get into anything to do with my usual Sunday post I’d just like to thank everyone who took the time out of their day to read and comment on it. You’ve all helped me so much, but I’ll come to that later. 
Monday, I was awake early to see Rachel off to the airport before I then spent the day revising. I did take the time to question whether technology and social media have taken over our lives, what do you think? Let me know here! I also shared an open letter to my mum as I felt like I needed to get things off my chest. I think Monday should’ve been a sign of the upcoming week.
Tuesday was another day of revision except, for a change of scene, Jason and I went Pokemon hunting in Glasgow. This was my first ever Pokemon hunt and it was actually quite fun once I figured out how to catch the Pokemon! 
On Wednesday, I began to go a little bit crazy. No amount of revision seemed to be helping me, and in the end I wound myself up beyond belief. I think Wednesday night was the night I began to be honest with myself with regards to university and life in general. That’s when I wrote “Well then”. After a mini break down, a lot of tears, and some wise words from a few friends, I was calm enough to bed.
I woke up on Thursday and phoned home to tell them how I was feeling. Again, more tears. It took a long time for me to calm down again. To be honest, I was still in hysterics when a few friends arrived. It meant I could distract myself for an hour before the exam. Sitting the exam, I’m no longer sure if it was actually an okay paper or if it just felt that way because I was so scared about not knowing anything for it, does that make sense? Afterwards, I came home and crawled into bed where I spent the rest of the night.
Friday morning dawned and I had to go back to uni for another exam. This one I can honestly say was a disaster. I don’t know whether it was a mind blank or if I’d ever known it to begin with. And so I came back and started job hunting. 
Yesterday, I woke up with a pounding headache for the 4th time this week. I thought nothing of it, took a few painkillers and started to clean the flat. However, after an hour, the headache was getting worse and worse, I began to feel dizzy if I even lowered my head to look at what I was doing, and any time I bent over I thought I was going to be sick. After a while, I practically crawled back to bed to try and sleep off whatever was wrong with me. 5 hours later I accepted this was a migraine and not a headache, and nowhere in the flat was dark or quiet enough to be of any help. I phoned home to ask for advice and was told to take some stinger painkillers and just keep sleeping. Eventually it lightened to the steady dull pain I’m used to, and I could actually sit up in bed without feeling nauseous. Within half an hour, Nuala was back!! So I forced my company on her for a few hours until we went our separate ways to head to bed.
Today, I’ll probably finish the cleaning I started yesterday, continue some revision, tidy my room, and maybe actually go to the gym! I’m excited to exercise again, is that sad?
How was your week?
Ktkinnes xx